Happy First Birthday!

*Warning: LONG POST!!!*

Happy First Birthday Monkey!!!! (Mr. Teething pants wasn't giving me too many smiles today)

Wow. I feel like this should be a very special post. I am the mother of a one year old! Wow, just remembering what I was doing exactly one year ago isn't the greatest memory but boy, is it clear. Let's see, it's 10:24pm as I'm writing right now. I was about 9cm dilated and sucking back on the gas. I had spent cm's 6-8 in the shower, well, more like on the floor of the shower with an exercise ball. 1am I pushed for 1 1/2 hours and was then given an epidural to `relax' and try to sleep. 6am I pushed for another 1/2 hour. I ended up having a C-section at 8am the next morning.

This year. Wow. I'd have to say that the first 4 months were the hardest months of my life. Lack of sleep was probably the greatest contributor with crazy hormones coming in as a close second. Gary and I had to work on a lot of stuff that seems to come up when both people are sleep deprived and suddenly a little more sensitive. Oh boy, I'm not making this sound very positive yet, just wait, I'll get to the nice stuff! I was proud of our guy for being so big but really, nothing else. He cried a lot. All the time. Getting him to sleep took an hour of rocking back and forth in my arms or using Gary's special method of pulling him back and forth on a blanket on the floor. I never really thought about what it would be like to have a newborn, I just knew I wanted to be a mom. I really thought that it would be easier. I loved being in the hospital (you're in there for 3 days with a C-section) and it was tough getting my mobility back. It's amazing how you use your abs for everything.

Once home, we walked a lot. I would walk to Extra Foods and by the time I was about to cross the last street to get to the store, he would usually stop screaming and fall asleep. If he wasn't asleep by that point, I'd head home. It was weird recovering from abdominal surgery as I couldn't even do one leg lift. However, I healed quite quickly and was able to do a 5km run after 2 months (and play football too around the 6 week mark!). Back to Kai. He had a very, very good appetite and loved his milk. He would eat at least every 3 hours although on those lovely growth spurt days, he'd eat every hour.

Around 4 months or so, he would just wake up at 4am and that was AMAZING!!! He also stopped crying so much and I really fell in love with him. To be honest, I was a little sad that he didn't look like me. He could've been anyone's kid and I didn't see me or Gary in him but now, I see our personalities and he does have my dimples:)

Okay, I really shouldn't talk about every month as its already in my old posts. I just want to focus now on who he is today. Wow. What a great kid. He is very laid back (ya, ya, he gets it from Gary) and loves to dance (woohoo!) and eat (that's both of us!). He is pretty careful (that's me) and gets a sneaky grin on his face when he shakes the lamp or pulls on the tv cables because he knows he's not allowed. He is a FABULOUS sleeper going down for his naps and bedtime without a whimper (as long as he has his blankie). He sticks his thumb in his mouth and minutes later, he's out. For this, I know I am sooooooo blessed! He is really loving his independence now and its harder to get hugs and kisses unless I'm holding a bottle of milk or his doggie. He's discovering something new each day and is really into opening drawers this week. He doesn't know how to go from his stomach to sitting to standing as he is pretty helpless on his stomach. Sometimes he wakes up in a panic in the night time because he's rolled onto his stomach and can't figure out how to get back onto his back.

These past 2 weeks have been tough on him because he had the chicken pox. He was unable to hang out with other kids which he really missed. He didn't understand why I had to detour from the park on our walks. I do have to say that teething has been really tough on him too but that's too be expected. I love this little guy so much and am so thankful to have him in my life. I'm nervous about the responsibility I have to help raise him and I'm scared of anything bad happening to him. I don't focus on these things and I mostly feel really happy to have such a great little guy to spend my time with.

Here's Kai with his buddy Micah at the park this week. His chicken pox finally scabbed up and he is no longer contagious.

(Gary is now going to bed, it's 11pm and I just want to finish this) Gary just wants to say that he loves Kai. One of his favourite moments was running with Kai in the jogging stroller the other day and as he was going up a long hill, Kai stared clapping and saying `Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!'. So cute, what a great little fan he is:)

He still does the spiderman walk around this house, holding onto the walls but just yesterday, he started walking on his own without our coaxing. Now, we REALLY have to keep our eyes and ears open!

Spiderman

Walking!

Eating

Kai, I just want to let you know that Daddy and I love you so much! You make us laugh and smile. We love it when we are driving and you sit in the back seat saying `Yesssss!' after one of us uses the word `yes' in our conversation. We love how you are so well behaved wherever we go. We love watching you play and dance. We love that you are taking careful risks with your walking:) We look forward to seeing what this next year brings and are so thankful to God for giving us a special little boy who brings such joy to our lives. Kai, we are going to try our best to show you what a good marriage looks like and how to communicate openly. We know that we will mess up but we know that with that comes forgiveness and growth. Again, we love you and we pray that this year will be full of wonder and learning and safety and laughter and even more love. You have taught me so much and I look forward to seeing what else I can learn from you! Happy first birthday Monkey!!!

PS Sorry you didn't get a dog for your birthday, I was tempted!