Friday, April 29, 2016

Five Tips for a Better Mother's Day

Maybe Mother's Day has always been perfect for you, but more likely than not, it has come with it's struggles. Whether the difficulty is with your own mother, your desire to be one, or even disappointment in how you were celebrated, I get it. My mom passed away a week before Mother's Day so celebrating other moms one week later, while six months pregnant with my first child, was not my favourite Mother's Day (hello, grief and hormones!) The year we went on a family walk to the grocery store was also not my first choice when I think of honouring a mom; I enjoy a good family walk but the location left a lot to be desired. So,with nine Mother's Days under my belt, I have a little experience with this, and I would like to share what I've learned.

Five Tips to a Better Mother's Day:

1. Be clear with expectations.
I'm a girl who loves words of affirmation.  I want a card telling me why I'm awesome (and not just "Happy Mother's Day!")  I have learned that even though everyone in my family knows I love affirmation, that doesn't mean I will get it unless I encourage my husband to make sure they are prepared. Thanking me for birthing him did count as an adequate compliment from Kai last year.

2. Be realistic.
Your kids aren't going to sleep in until 9 AM if they get up at 6 AM every day. Your day will probably be pretty close to what it normally is – don't envision a personal spa in your living room, amazing breakfast set forth in your kitchen, and magical children that all get along.  If anything remotely awesome happens, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

3. Treat yourself.
It could be an ice cream cone or maybe even a new dress (that's what I did!) but give yourself a pat on the back in the form of something you'd really like. Make sure it's within your budget or you could be dealing with feelings of guilt which could also ruin Mother's Day.

4. Reflect beforehand.
The day before, take some time to think about your children and what you appreciate about each one. This sounds cheesy but reflection really helps with perspective. Yes, you want to be pampered and appreciated, but it's also a time to be thankful for the role that you have. Gratitude needs to be practiced.

5. Don't compare. 
One of my favourite quotes is "Comparison is the thief of joy" by Theodore Roosevelt. Now, this year we are doing something awesome by going to Whistler but before you compare or get jealous, remember, one year we walked to the grocery store. PS Not my husband's fault, we all have periods of "survival mode" and that was one of them!

As a mom to biological and foster children, I am thankful for the unique and important role I have each and every day.  It's tough, much harder than I thought, but we can do hard things. And seriously, at the end of the day when they are all asleep, they are so cute. I hope you have a good Mother's Day and here's the present to myself:

What has been your experience with Mother's Day?  Anything else you would add to this list?


Have you had a Mother's Day that did not live up to your expectations? Here are five tips to help prevent disappointment and allow you to enjoy it to the fullest.


  1. Thanks, friend! Let me know if you do treat yourself and what you get ;)

  2. This is a great list - so good to have clear expectations and not be afraid to communicate them to the family so they know what is important to you!

    Also...I'm going to be in Whistler over the weekend too! What are the chances...would be so funny to run into you :)

    1. You are?! With your family?! So wild because we haven't been up there as a family is 5 years. Hope we run into each other 😊

    2. no, not my family! :D The ladies from our life group :) :) We planned it and told our husbands it would be a great mother's day gift to let us get away for the weekend! We'll still be home for half the day on Sunday but i am SO excited! I'll keep an eye out for you!

  3. I have struggled with emotional stuff around Mother's Day too. You're smart to start thinking about it early on. Great advice. BTW Your dress is super cute. Lovely colour on you, mama!