Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Journey to Fostering

As some people have noticed from the Adoption & Fostering Journey tab on the top of my blog, there will be some changes in our family.  Three years ago we were on the adoption waiting list for a baby and then we put it on hold, had Nya, and well, here we are.  We have started the process of becoming foster parents.  We are still at the beginning stages as we've just filled out the whole application and met with our awesome social worker.  Still to come is the home study and the education portion which will happen throughout the fall.  It is so similar to the adoption journey so I'm thankful that it feels familiar.  Hopefully if everything goes smoothly we will have a child in our home by the end of this year.

To answer the questions that we get all the time:

Q.  What age?
A.  We are wanting to foster a child that is within the age range of our own children.  So, 2-10 ish years of age.

Q. What about your own kids?  Aren't you worried about them?
A.  Our children are our priority.  We know it will not be easy on them.  Kai and Koen understand what will be happening as much as they can.  Kai is really hoping for a buddy to play hockey and video games with but knows that this may not be realistic:)   We know we will have to be watching our children more.  We know that the kids will learn from each other, good and bad.

Q.  Have you always wanted to be foster parents?
A.  No.  We wanted to adopt a child through an adoption agency.  You just never know what will happen in life and where your heart and God will lead you.

Q. Why?????
A.  Similarly to adoption, we have a great family (I think) with love to give.  There are needs all over the world, but there are also so many needs within our own community.  If we can provide a child with a stable and loving home, then I think we should.  Yes, it would be much easier to just keep doing what we're doing.  But just because something is easy doesn't mean it's the right thing to do.

Q.  Are you hoping to adopt a child through fostering?
A.  That is not the plan as the goal is almost always to return the children to their parents.  To be honest, you never know what could happen.  I am definitely open to it.

Q. How long would a child be with you?
A.  We are planning on doing short term which would be up to a year.

Q.  Will the child go to school with Kai and Koen?
A.  From what we know so far, they will continue going to the school that they already attend to keep the constants in their life in place.  If it was longer term, there is a chance that they could go with the boys but that would be if the parents and social worker agreed and we paid for it.

Q.  Can you handle it emotionally?
A.  I don't know how I will feel when the child goes home.  Sad?  Frustrated and concerned?  Happy for them? I don't know.  I have dealt with the loss of my mother to cancer which is  REALLY sad.  And I survived.  And as sad as her death was, my life with her was so worth it.  Does that make sense?  The good outweighs the bad.

I don't love being so question and answery about this but I just want to sum up our hearts with
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ish, the Message (modern) version:

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut.
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself no others,
Isn't always `me first'
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doeesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovell,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

We will be cutting back on photography significantly in 2015 and we will likely just do a few weddings.  My time and energy will be spent in our home, with our family, as I want to make sure that my focus is on them all.  Depending on if the child is in school, I would love to continue subbing once a week for my sanity.

I would just encourage everyone be open to possibilities.  You never know what will be placed on your heart.  We will try one year at a time.  This could be the hardest year of our lives.  This could be the best year of our lives.  This could be a year of great growth.  This could be a year of disappointments.  We don't know, but we won't know unless we try.

So, that's where the Chapman family is at right now.  Thanks for following along.  Please ask questions if you have any!

Love, Louise

11 comments:

  1. I love your heart for others. Way to go Chapman family!

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  2. Wow - that's so exciting! That is awesome that you want to share your family's love with another child! Can't wait to hear about your journey:)

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  3. Love it! My good friend has been going through the process of adopting through the system to add to their current family of four. There is so much need and so many kids in the system. It has been eye opening to follow along with them throughout the process. I think it's amazing.

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  4. Thank you, girls!
    Ashley-it is unbelievable what a need there is. In Surrey alone (where we live) there are over 800 children in the foster system.

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  5. Bless you guys! Love how you're letting God use you!!

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  6. Good for you! I hope it's a great year and filled with many blessings as you go through this process!

    I also giggled at the letter from BC because it has a typo on it!

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  7. What a wonderful investment of all your family's resources! We think foster parents are worth their weight in gold - especially those who have it in them to not only care for, but actually love the kids in their homes. SO glad you're doing this - you will be wonderful!

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  8. This is awesome! You guys will be so great.

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  9. I found your blog through another's who was nominated for the Top 30. I've only just started into your most recent post, but wow!!! what incredible content. God Bless you on your endevour to foster. What a deeply benevolent and wonderful gift to offer to children in need.

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  10. This is so exciting!!! Congrats!!!

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