Tuesday, December 03, 2013

Work and Kids

*I don't know what the point of this post is or if it even makes sense but just some thoughts about being home with the kiddos these days*

I've been fortunate to experience what it's like to work full time, part time with kids, be a stay at home mom, work at home mom, work on call etc.  Each totally has it's pros and cons.  I can't even choose what I think is best for me.  For now though?   It really works well to work from home (or at a session) 3 hours a day, 6 days a week, and then a day of subbing in there somewhere.  

I'm so thankful  that I have a flexible schedule, that is definitely ideal.   Kids are sick? I can put off editing for a day and just put in an extra hour or two the next day.  Nya has an extra long nap?  I can get more done.  I am thankful that I have enough work!  So incredibly thankful for those wonderful people in my life who have booked us or recommended us.   When I have a few days in a row with no work to do, it doesn't sit well with me.  I feel very...off. Bored.  You know how many people feel recharged after socializing?  I feel recharged after I finish editing a session:)  Being at home can be very boring.  Yup, kids are great but it's the same old every day (well, throw in a sickness or rash or school project or vehicle that needs to be repaired) but it's pretty much the same thing over and over.

And then financially.  Things have gotten pricier these days.  Next year we have tuition for Kai AND Koen.  We bought a `new' van and then next year we will need to get a new car as ours is just holding on.  Our school AND our church are in a building project.  We have various other people/organizations that we like to support.  Thankfully our photography business allows us to do these things.  It will definitely be a few years before we do a big trip again:)   
{I LOVE purple}

I know everyone is different, I just wish I had figured out the perfect amount for me earlier.  I guess with the addition of each kid, it took a little figuring out.  Getting Graves' Disease and realizing I can't thrive off stress anymore took a huge adjustment.  It's hard knowing I CAN do more but I choose not to.  It's totally not me.  Or, maybe not Old Louise, but it's the New Louise.  Mom of 3 Louise.

With my last post, about comparison, I just need to say that the biggest way that comparison hits me is with photography.  I feel pretty confident in most areas of my life, but man, if I start looking at other photography sites/facebook pages/pinterest, it just messes with me.  I really try to limit myself.  There is a desire to see what others are doing, get inspired, make sure I'm on the right track pricing wise etc but it can quickly lead to `Oh my goodness, they are sooo good and I'm not!' or `How do they have so many likes?' `Why doesn't anyone like this picture?' `Wow, my pictures are never that creative!'  `Oh man, how do they have time to do so much?!' etc.   It's not a good feeling.  I know most people struggle with something in their lives, comparison wise, and I am not alone.

Finally, having Koen and Nya home is a bit of work.  Kai was, and is, the easiest to parent (oops, am I comparing them?).   As his teacher says, `He's just so teachable'.  He needs very little instruction and is very independent.  Koen needs so much instruction and is such a pest (I mean that in a loving troublemaker kind of way).  I feel like if my kids didn't fight, I could have 12 of them.  It's the fighting that drives me bonkers.   Nya is so whiny and screamy due to the previously mentioned pest.  Being at home with them is a test of patience, but, I am so thankful that I can be here with them.   Because even though it takes every ounce of patience that I have, I get to be there when Nya gets an owie (usually from `the pest') or learns a new word.  I get to be there when Koen is at swimming lessons and puts his face in for three seconds and then jumps up, hands in the air and shouts `Yahoo!!'. 

I think I am just reflective of this whole being at home thing right now because we are in basketball season.  Gary is gone a lot.  I need to really focus on being patient as the days are longer. 

Hope you are having a good week!  We've started our advent activities which the kids love.  For me, it helps provide something fun for them to do while Gary is gone.  He has his first real game tonight!  Go Falcons:)  

Love, Louise

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