Tuesday, September 27, 2011

What I Need

My mom was a practical woman and she always thought she never had the right words to say, but you know what, she did. I think what I miss the most, and need the most, is my mom saying, `I'm proud of you.'. She used to say it all the time (dad did too, thanks Dad!). I'm a big `words of affirmation' type person and thankfully I have a lot of friends that are good at encouraging me. But you know what, sometimes I just really wish I could hear it from my mom. She was so good at being truly happy for us when we were happy. For being there for us no matter what (even in my terribly grumpy stage from ages 12-15). For understanding when we needed space but letting us know that she was there for us. I think that's it...that she just felt our happiness or sadness as her own. She loved us so much. So, so much. She just loved being a mom. I miss her. The sad thing is, I don't know what it's like to be a mom and have a mom at the same time. I don't know what that relationship could ever be like, but I can imagine it. It makes me sad. I wish she could see me. I think she would think I was a pretty good mom:) I would love to let her know how incredibly thankful I was for all she did for us, she sure did a lot. Five kids in eight years, and boy, did we have a great childhood.
Miss you mom.

3 comments:

  1. What an amazing model of a loving, passionate Mom you had through her. She is probably one of the reasons that you love being a Mom to your sweet boys. I wish, for you though, that she could be here.

    ReplyDelete
  2. agreed lou. sometime i allow myself to have "pity moments", briefly. and than i remember i still have 4 awesome sister, a dad, and joanne- who is awesome with sami. so than the moment is gone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am sure that your mother would be very proud of you. It is so true that we appreciate our mothers more once we become mothers and realize the extend of the love and self sacrifice that mothers give!

    ReplyDelete