Friday, May 07, 2010

Dear Mom

(my momma and mom was seriously always smiling)
Mom, it's 4 years today. I miss you. I'm sad that you've missed out on so much. You've missed meeting Jan, Jackie and Trish's husbands. You missed out on the birth of 4 of your grandkids. Two of those are your first grandsons; my boys. One that acts like me and another that looks just like me. You would love them. So much. If I could just have one minute, I would just want to see you with the grandkids. I would take a million pictures (did you know that Gary and I have a photography business?!). I'd even take just 10 seconds. The boys are so beautiful and hilarious. Whenever I bake with Kai, I think of you. I want them to know their oma, it's so hard to explain it at this age.

Being a mom, I know you more. I wish I could've talked to you about motherhood. I'm sorry I was a pain in the butt when I was a teenager. Thank you for sticking with me and showing so much grace and patience. Thank you for showing me what it really means to be beautiful. Thank you for your unconditional love and support. Thank you for teaching us a love of baking, cooking and even cleaning the house:) Thank you for teaching us what it looks like to be a good wife and mother.

Don't worry about us, we're all doing well. I know you were most worried about dad. He's doing very well and Joanne is taking good care of him:) I guess you never knew that he had cancer...he just had a recent check up and all is well. He also got his fancy sports car for his retirement gift to himself. He has some other fun toys up at Green Lake. Kai and Koen got to ride on the new quad, it was awesome. You would've loved it. He takes Kai out for coffee which Kai loves. The boys love their Opi. Dad wouldn't let us call him Opa so we call him Opi, do you like it?

Did you know that I have Graves' Disease? It's an autoimmune disease. I was really sick for 6 weeks and you should have seen how Gary responded. He was a wonderful, understanding and supportive husband. I got a good one mom. It's pretty much under control right now, I just can't get my heart rate down to a normal resting rate. I would think that you may have had it because you were so skinny but you always had a perfect heart rate and blood pressure. I'm nervous as my sisters and I get older because that's a whole lot of women to worry about in regards to breast cancer...hoping that detection tests and treatment get better and better.

The other girls are all fine. Don't worry, we're all getting along well. Jani still tells us ridiculous stories that you would love. The other day, she said that Sami was pretty much crawling already (she's 6 weeks old), you would've laughed so loudly! Maria is pregnant with your 6th grandchild. Jackie is doing her Masters in Nursing and Trish is now working in Chilliwack. They tore down your house and now there are 6 more in it's place. They kept a couple of the trees that you like. I'm growing my hair out, I know you always liked it longer. I miss you. I'm thankful that you were my mom. I'd take a super awesome mom for a shorter amount of time any day. Happy Mother's Day mom.

Love, Louise (your favourite oldest daughter!)


  1. Beautiful lou. I'm bawling. I think she is too (the happy kind of crying) somewhere. That's a lovely note.

  2. couple comments
    1) where do you find the time to write such nice stuff?
    2) that made me cry. 2nd time today (first time i was balling with sami in my arms as we watced baby story and she was smiling)
    3) i agree about the good mom for a shorter time any day
    4)i like the way you wrote it in a note form, thats awesome. i wish i had a way with words like you and some other sisters do
    5) thanks for steping up as one of "mom figure" (maria too!) and answering all my crazy stories and helping me with sami, it makes mom very happy.
    6) kai and koen are very lucky to have a good mom like you, with the abundance of pictures, and our kids are lucky to have "aunty louise"( in your chanting voice that makes sami smile, i have been doing that the last couple of days with doug to get smiles from S)
    ps: now sami is not only crawling up me but i think she actually said mama this morning. VEry advanced, she gets this from me.

  3. Oh Louise...
    What a beautiful, heart-wrenching letter.

  4. Very beautifully written Louise.

  5. Beautiful Louise.

  6. so very lovely louise :) an awesome testament to what sounds like an amazing mother:)

  7. Sending lots of love your way this time of year.
    Thank you for sharing your process/progress.

  8. so beautiful...thank you for sharing this.

  9. Thank you for sharing a piece of your mom with us. She sounds beautiful, inside and out. Thinking of you as you celebrate Mother's Day and remember how wonderful she was.

  10. I forgot to say that you are a great mom you. Well done on being super Lou.

  11. Anonymous12:51 PM

    beautiful. thanks for sharing such an intimate letter-

  12. This made me cry. I can totally relate to feeling that my "dad" (Jon's Dad), or maybe it is me that has missed out on so much. I want him to meet his grand daughter, and read her bed time stories, and hear him laugh at her goofy antics. I think I'd love to write something like this... maybe one day. Thanks for being so honest. I love it.

    PS... Feel free to copy what ever you want from my blog!

  13. I know i'm late on this but I must tell you that that was beautiful. your mom sounds like she was an amazing person.