There are nine different types: Perfectionist, Helper, Performer, Romantic, Investigator, Loyalist, Enthusiast, Challenger and Peacemaker. I was certain I was going to be a Helper or Performer but found out I was Type 1: The Perfectionist. I immediately thought "No, I'm not! I don't try to look perfect!" but it is not image based. I have a deep need to know and follow rules and get everything done before relaxing. If someone is in the 12 items or less line at the grocery store and they have 14 items? Not okay. Why are there rules if you're not going to follow them?
Another word for The Perfectionist is The Reformer which sits a little more nicely with me. They have a sense of mission with the influence that they have which makes sense why I take this space so seriously. Some of these characteristics taken from The Road Back to You (a must-read book on this topic) are:
- If I say I'll do it, I'll do it.
- I spend a lot of time thinking about how I can be a better person.
- I notice immediately when things are wrong or out of place.
- I don't feel comfortable when I try to relax. There is too much to be done.
- I worry a lot.
- I am really disappointed when other people don't do their part.
- I like routine and don't readily embrace change.
- I try to be careful and thoughtful about how I spend money
Wow, I do not sound very fun.
When I'm healthy, I can change the world. When I'm stressed, I can tear it down with my anger and words.
This is hard for me to admit but healthy to recognize it. I can embrace my perfectionism but also work with it – transform my thoughts to get the best parts of it and recognize when I am under stress. Some of the transformative path suggestions are to work on self-compassion (note what my inner critic says), resist the urge to give others to-do lists (Gary sighs with relief!), resist redoing what others have done (can Koen really clean a toilet?!), be aware how you accept criticism from others (I usually get so defensive) and pick a hobby you aren't good at just for the love of it.
Where things get very interesting is I asked Gary to take the test and found out he is The Investigator. This has opened my eyes and allowed me to understand him and the struggles that we have so much better! Some of the characteristics listed in The Road Back to You are:
- I can take care of myself, and I think others could do the same.
- I don't always say things out loud, but in my head I am pretty sarcastic and cynical.
- I think thoughts are more reliable than feelings.
- I need a couple of days to process an experience or know how I feel about something.
- Sometimes I think I should be more generous. It's hard for me.
- Material possessions don't make me happy.
In order to work through something we should try to understand each other rather than just compromise or agree to disagree.
This doesn't mean that we have to agree but it is a lot harder to be frustrated with someone when you can see where they are coming from and why they respond the way they do. This works for ourselves too! If we want to accept ourselves, in order to truly feel a sense of belonging, we need to bravely work through the steps of being vulnerable in self-discovery.
Take the quiz which is about 5-10 minutes long. Yes, I am being teachy and preachy but I can't help it – it's who I am!
Brave is exploring who you are.
Brave is accepting it.
Brave is working on transformation.
“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ― BrenĂ© Brown
Have you taken the test? What were the results? Do you feel it is accurate? Be sure to look up your type in more detail here.
Love,
Louise
As always, I'd love to see you on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.
This is part of a writing challenge prompted by the word BRAVE. Here are what some other writers shared using that theme:
Tamara at Discovering Parenthood
Shannon at Shannon Lee Blog
Robyn at Creativity Strikes
I agree! Self discovery is terrifying and feeling vulnerable is scary. It does mean we need to be brave to face ourselves. Great insights.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Robyn! Sometimes it would be easier to just try not to think about it but I know I like self-improvement ;)
DeleteI just took the on-line test and came out as a Type 9 - Peacemaker. I actually thought I would be a Perfectionist, like you, as I certainly have some of those tendencies as well. Interesting.
ReplyDeleteInteresting! To move one step further, you are technically a type 9 with a "1 wing" or "8 wing" so I'm guessing with you saying you have those tendencies, you are a 9 with a 1 wing!
Deleteah...probably - I will have to look into this more!
DeleteI got Enthusiast, but yet many of the tendencies you describe fit me as well.
ReplyDeleteMy dad is an enthusiast and I get my sense of adventure from him!
DeleteI'm an investigator--explains the kids getting annoyed with me for the multitude of questions I ask when I am trying to understand a situation they got themselves in!
ReplyDelete