Saturday, July 12, 2014

What Will They Remember?

Today I went to a funeral.  It was for a man in our church who had such a huge servant heart and touched many people's lives.  The hardest part for me was hearing from his son, because I know, I've been there and it sucks to lose a parent (he's actually has now lost both parents and a sister...so sad).   When I heard about the things that he appreciated about his dad, a lot of it came from the childhood that they had. Playing hockey together.  Going camping.  Being there.  This made me think about what my kids are going to remember about me when they are older.  

                           

What are the things that I remember and appreciate about my mom?  The main one was that she was a fantastic listener.  She was always available and loved to know about our lives.  This is the reason why my sisters and I send so many emails to each other, it's to be heard.  Secondly, she was practical and down to earth.  She didn't get all emotional which was good because I was the emotional one.  Even with 5 daughters all so close in age, she was almost always very calm and present.  She taught us how to manage our money wisely.  Thirdly, she was supportive.  She encouraged us in our dreams and made sure that we knew how important our education was.  She may not have loved all of my decisions but she let me find out for myself why it may not have been the best decision.  Finally, we knew how much she loved God, my dad, her family, and us kids.   We all felt that unconditional love.  Those are some of the things that stick out. 

So what would my kids remember about me now?  I'm not sure.  What would stand out?   

                                       

Would it be the time we spend going on family walks and exploring together?  Or would it be me on my iPhone?  

Would it be me setting their clothes out and preparing meals?  Or would it be me saying `Get out of the office, I'm working'. 

Would it be me laughing and chasing them?  Or would it be me yelling at them to put their shoes on, go to the bathroom, and get into the van?

Would it be me cuddled up on the couch reading with them? Or would it be me checking out facebook as they sit reading alone on the other couch?

Would it be me asking them about their day?  Or would it be me asking everyone to just be quiet?



I think one of the reasons why I'm taking a break  from GC Photography this fall is that I want to be more present with my family.  I only have a few years left of Nya being home and I don't want to `waste' it spending so much time on the computer.  I'm not trying to be perfect but I am trying to be more present.  I like that.  It doesn't mean that I always have to be here (I have great plans to exercise more) but when I am, I want to be 100% here.


So, here's to being more present.  Hopefully.  Thoughts?

Love, Louise



3 comments:

  1. I went to a parenting conference back in january, and this was more or less the challenge. Funny how "life" and "routine" get in the way and I've neglected some of the things I learned there. I'm taking this as a challenge to renew my efforts in being present with my kids. Thanks for the reminder!

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  2. Looking back to when I was little, I don't remember the moments my mom hoped I wouldn't remember, but I do remember the things that were good and worth remembering. we all fail in one way or another (or 10), but it's the effort in becoming better. We learn with them. So I think as long as we look to recognize our mistakes, work to correct them, ask for forgiveness from our kids and rely on God, we're doing the best we can!

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  3. Beth- sounds like an interesting conference! I think we need to visit you soon! Koen would love to see Thomas.

    Kelly-I agree. I think asking for forgiveness of your kids is huge, I will never forget the one time in my life my dad apologized to me. I know I need to improve on my iPhone usage, it's on me way too much. That's why Manning was awesome, no reception :)

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